


Distant Memories

by BeautyAndStrength



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Aged Reader, Angst and Feels, F/M, Female Reader, Memories, Old Reader, Reunions, nursing homes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-06
Updated: 2018-11-06
Packaged: 2019-08-20 00:49:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16545617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BeautyAndStrength/pseuds/BeautyAndStrength
Summary: He was no longer under their command anymore, which meant that he was free. Free to help the Winchesters and free, at last, to see you againAfter seven decades apart, Castiel is finally free to see the woman he loved so long ago.





	Distant Memories

_“I was getting too close to the humans in my charge.”_

That was what he had told Dean. Those were the exact words he used.

He wasn’t like the other angels, he knew that. He had emotions, feelings; a heart. The others always said that he had too much heart. 

It caused problems, they would say. And they were right, sometimes.

Every time he was given charge of a human, every time he was assigned to protect or look after one, he had a tendency to grow emotionally attached to them; to develop feelings towards them, in some way.

But none of it was more profound than what he had felt with you.

You were the reason why his superiors had begun to lose faith in him.

* * *

 

He fell in love with you, it was no secret, and he wasn’t going to deny it. Not now, not ever.

He didn’t understand what the emotion was at first. But as the years passed, it soon became clear to him.

He never thought he could ever fall in love, least of all with a human. But he did, and he didn’t regret it. His only regret was that he left; he left you.

He left because they told to him to leave. The others had found out about his feelings and immediately they called him back to Heaven. They forbid him from ever seeing you again, and he obeyed.

He obeyed because it’s what he always did.

He wished he hadn’t, though. He wished he had stayed; he wished he had stayed with you. The day he left you, he left a part of himself behind. A piece of his heart was missing and he didn’t know if it would ever be restored.

It had been nearly seventy years since he had seen you. To any other angel that’s not that long, but to him it was like an eternity. And he knew that to you, it probably felt like much longer.

You were younger then, much younger. You were on the brink of woman hood when he saw you last.

And you were beautiful. In every sense of the word, you were beautiful.

He was your guardian, your protector. He would have given his life for you. He would have sacrificed himself if it meant saving you from every monster that would try to harm you.

Unfortunately, he realized that no matter how hard he might try, there were many things that were out of his hands.

They told him to leave you, they told him to forget. He always did what they told him to do, he was always obedient. Only this time, his heart wouldn’t let him obey, not completely.

He did leave, but he never forgot. He never forgot you.

He always thought of you. Memories of you were one of the few comforts he had.

But he didn’t see you ever. For nearly 7 decades, he was cut off from you entirely. As long as he was under their command he wasn’t allowed. And all those years he believed he had no other choice.

Until now.

Now he realized he did have a choice. He could choose freedom, and that’s what he did.

He rebelled; he rebelled against Heaven, he rebelled against them.

He was no longer under their command anymore, which meant that he was free. Free to help the Winchesters and free, at last, to see you again.

* * *

 

He stood in the doorway of your room at the nursing home where you now resided. You were sitting by the window staring out at the beauty of the world outside. Your back was towards him and you seemed unaware of his presence.  He stood and stared at you for a moment, unsure whether he should approach you or not. 

From where he was he could see very clearly what Time had done to you.

Your (H/C) hair, which used to be long and full, had now become fine and white.  Your once smooth and soft skin had grown rough and wrinkled. You were thin and frail, but there was still an essence of strength about you. You sat in that chair just staring out the window.

He couldn’t see your face so he could not tell if you looked out upon the world with a sense of sadness or serenity.

And he wondered if you even remembered him.

“Excuse me, sir. Only family members are allowed in here.”

He snapped out of his thoughts and turned to face the young, male nurse who had just addressed him.

Before he even had a chance to answer, you spoke.

“It’s alright, Justin. You can let him in.”

“Are you sure, Miss (Y/N)?”

“Yes, I’m sure. Don’t worry; he’s an old friend of mine.” You hadn’t turned around once the whole time.

The nurse did as he was told and escorted him in.

“Leave us.” You said, still staring out the window. Once again, the nurse did as he was told.

The room was silent for a moment.

“Hello, Castiel.”

His heart leapt. You  _did_ remember him!

“Hello, (Y/N).”

“You came back. My angel has finally returned to me.”

Then for the first time, you turned and looked at him.

You (E/C) eyes looked deep into his, and he could see that although your body had been ravaged by age, your soul had remained completely untouched.

It still glowed with a warm light, just like it did all those years ago. He could see it shining strong and bright in your eyes.

It was that very same light that made you different from any other human he knew.

It was that light that made him fall in love with you.

“I knew you would come back.” You said smiling.

“How did you know it was me?”

“I’d recognize the glow of your grace anywhere, Castiel.”

He smiled. You always were able to see things that other people couldn’t. It was one of the many things that made you special.

Lifting your hand, you motioned for him to sit down. He obeyed, pulling up a chair to sit right next to you.

“You have a new vessel, I see.”

“And I’ve had a few others since I left.”

“I remember the one you had at the time was quite a bit younger than this one. But he was still just as handsome. Then again, you always did like to pick the handsome ones, didn’t you?”

He smiled again. You were just as witty as you were when he saw you last. You were one of the few people he knew who could make him laugh.

“How are the folks up in Heaven treating you?”

His smile faded and his eyes fell to the floor. Immediately, you understood.

“Do you want to talk about it?” You asked.

“No, I don’t. I’d much rather talk about you.”

You smiled and nodded.

For the next half hour, he sat and listened intently as you told him about your life.

You told him about your family; about your children, your grandchildren and even your great-grandchildren.  You told him about the things you’ve done, the places you’ve been and the people you’ve met.

Your eyes sparkled as you spoke and he smiled when he saw it.

He knew then that although you were now old, you were happy.

You had lived a good, long life; a life overflowing with joy and heartbreak, happiness and tears. A life filled with love.

A life that he had missed.

After you finished, he smiled sadly and looked out the window.

“(Y/N), I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“Leaving; I shouldn’t have left. I should’ve stayed; I should’ve stayed with you.”

“You were just doing what you needed to do.”

He turned and looked at you.

“No, I was doing what  _they_ wanted me to do. But it didn’t feel right, not to me.”

You reached your hand up and placed it gently on his cheek. Although the texture of your skin had changed, the warmth that radiated from it had not. He leaned in to your touch, just like you used to do to him all those years ago.

“You haven’t changed that much, Castiel. You’re still just as loyal as you’ve always been. That’s what I admired most about you.”

He looked deep into your eyes. “I missed you.”

“And I missed you too, my angel.”

“I loved you, (Y/N). I don’t know if you knew that.”

You smiled. “I was aware.”

“Did you ever love me?”

“I did.”

“Do you still?”

“Yes. But why say it now? Many years have passed and I’m an old woman now. My days are coming to an end. Do you still love me, even though Time has stolen my beauty away?”

He looked at you for a moment, then he leaned forward and pulled you into a tight embrace. You clung onto his coat and nuzzled your face against his chest. He rested his chin on the top of your head and held you close.

“I don’t care about that.” He said. “Time means nothing. No matter how old you get, you will always be beautiful to me.”

“And you will always be my angel.”

At that moment, the silent tears that he had been holding back spilled over, but he didn’t care.

Right now, he was happy; happier than he had ever been.

And the piece of his heart that was missing was now restored as he held his beloved in his arms for the first time in years; and possibly, the last time.

Nevertheless, he was happy.

You both were.


End file.
